Love Notes #9

Bhe,

It has been a long week. Normally, it would have been a breeze. But now, it's tiring, stressful, and it's driving me crazy. We haven't had a real conversation for the longest time since we've been together. I don't know how much more I can take it. I know you have every right to be mad after what I happened. I'm stupid, stubborn, and irresponsible. But please do believe me when I say that I am trying to change. Because I don't want this relationship to end. I want to fight for it, for this, for us. Because nothing is more important to me right now than to you. But Bhe, I need to know that you need me too. That you love me too. Because I feel so tired and stressed out right now that for the first time since we moved in together, I'm starting to doubt. I don't want to continue on this path but you're not giving me any alternative right now. Please, please, please help me. I can't do this on my own.

A friend sent me a message saying that a successful relationship requires one to fall inlove everyday with the same person. I can say with all my heart that I am. Every single time I see you, your smile, your smell, even the sound of your laugh makes me fall for you more and more each day. There is no one else in this world I would rather be than be with you. I love you so much. But Bhe, please give me something to hold on to. Because no matter how deep the well might be, time will come that it will dry out if it's not being replenished from time to time. And right now, as much as I would regret admitting it, the well is drying out. A famine is in the horizon and its scaring the life out of me.

Please save me...